In His Grip

Isa 49:15-16
"Can a woman forget her nursing child, And not have compassion on the son of her womb? Surely they may forget, Yet I will not forget you.
See, I have inscribed you on the palms of My hands".

Psalm 40:1
I waited patiently for the LORD; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit,out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock. He put a new song in my mouth.

I think that no matter how old we are we need to be in a safe pair of hands. The weaker you are the more support you need. I would imagine that if you were in a slimy pit full of mud, slowly going under you would cry out for help, hoping upon hope that someone strong enough will pass by that can get you out. I can see me stretching out my mud covered hands in desperation. Then the 'grip' that will never slip, never weaken, never let go is felt and we know instinctively that we will be saved from the pit.

Thank you Lord for your hands, pierced for my sins, thank you Lord that your hands reach out to us in love and compassion, to save us from the pit of hell, to a new life based on you as our sure foundation.

Still About, but Missing the Posts

Sorry for the delay in posting my thoughts. The two useful brain cells are currently being overloaded with work. The old body is being abused by attending two of my daughter’s graduations and preparing for one daughter’s wedding on the 25th of this month.

This Friday I am attending Amanda’s graduation at Queens University at Belfast in Northern Ireland. She has qualified with a Bachelors degree in Theology from Queens University. She intends to return to complete a Masters degree in September after she gets married and settles into married life.

A couple of weeks ago my wife Hazel and myself attended the graduation of Amanda’s twin sister Gillian. She graduated from Stirling University in Scotland with a Bachelor of Arts degree, and she also is returning there to do a Masters degree in Social Work.

The photo shows Gillian and Hazel my wife relaxing after the graduation. These are just two out of the four beautiful women in my family. Beautiful women not only in how they look, but beautiful in terms of their hearts, minds and souls. I am a blessed man and I praise the Lord for his favour on my life.

I still have not got my computer fixed which does cause me problems in posting to my blog. I am hopeful that tomorrow the HP technical person will have finally found out what they are going to do to fix the problem, once and for all time.

Finally……… a thought for to-day

How to Avoid Frustration
Keep your shoulder to the wheel
Your hand to the helm
Your eye on the ball!
Your nose to the grindstone
Your ear to the ground
And you will not have time to
Put your foot in your mouth.

IT Strikes Back

Well! It had to happen. I took all my toys on holiday and I broke a couple of them. Mini Computer, PDA, Smartphone and mobile. It used to be work related books, much to Hazel's annayance, but now I have progressed to IT toys.

My equipent load had a few unexpected problems for us. I had to say sorry to my daughter Jennifer who was carrying my hand luggage through airport security, and was stopped and searched due to the amount of wires in the bag. Over 90% of these wires were mine. I had all the power adaptors a human being could ever need in that bag.

Just after my last post while in Spain on holiday, the computer 'froze' and stopped working. Ever try to get technical support while in a foreign country? Not to be recommended for those who have a problem with patience. Cutting a long story short I had to wait until my return home from holiday to get this problem addressed, but I did correspond with some nice people in the USA and in India to see if I could solve the problem while in Spain.

The computer people told me that I should have the small computer operating next week! That is the promise, but I will wait and see.

After my computer failure I started to use my smartphone and updated some software while in Spain. Only to find out that I had to be in the UK to get it to work when the software was installed. Now no smartphone was available.

The PDA worked well. I use it primarily for E-Sword bible software which is wonderful. However, the screen is so small that it is only useful for 'short' messages. Add to this the fact that I could not get my hands on it due to my two daughters using it for 'Facebook', messaging updates etc, I was down to the mobile phone as a last means for communication to the outside world.

I thank the Lord that communication with Him is available 24/7. No need for hard discs, only soft hearts, no need for RAM, we only have to remember HIM, and we can enter his throne room.

With all our obsession with communication with the outside world, such as blogs, twitter and facebook etc. how easy it is for us to forget the ultimate communication medium available to us 'Prayer'. May we rely more on that perfect and fully reliable heavenly system than the man made communication devices that we use each day.

Finally ................ a thought for to-day

The 'windows' of heaven are always open to our prayers

On Holiday

I am sitting in Southern Spain as I write this. I am looking out over the Mediterranean sea, listening to the sounds of the children in the swimming pool mixed with the sound of the waves crashing against the rocks. The photo has just been taken from my room, using the webcam on the computer.

Years ago I would have been thrilled to be here. It would have been magical, but now, I confess that I have become blasé about going on holiday. I rarely every think about the holiday before I get to the airport to catch the flight. I rarely count my annual holiday as a blessing!

I wonder how many other blessings in my life have I not counted lately?

I over heard a lady on the plane saying to her daughter that she could not wait to get into the swimming pool so that she could 'chillax'. That is a new 'combination' word that I had not come across before. Then I was reminded that at the end of the post I made a few weeks ago on the 'Daily Affirmation of Faith', there is a sentence at the end of it which says:-

I now receive God’s promised rest for this day (Heb. 4: 1-13). Therefore, I relax in the trust of faith, knowing that in the moment of temptation, trial, or need, the Lord Himself will be there as my strength and sufficiency (1 Cor. 10: 13).

So instead of continually dipping myself in a swimming pool for my relaxation, I intend (when possible) to quiet my mind and my heart before the Lord and use the holiday time to 'chillax' in thinking about the many blessings that He has given to me, which includes this holiday.

Finally a thought for to-day

Putting Christ first brings a blessing that lasts

A Close Encounter of a 'Bird' Kind

I love this time of year, smelling the cut grass, seeing trees come to life. I have to say that spring to early summer are my favourite seasons.

One morning last week. I was carrying our wee dog Pebbles out to the garden for a run around. (Being a near blind dog, it is wonderful to watch her once her paws hit the grass, her tail goes up and she trots around, nose in the air, off on her adventures).

Well! on this particular morning as I opened the back door of the house I disturbed the birds feeding on the grass. I then spotted a young collared dove heading straight for me on a 'kamikaze' flight path. My reactions kicked in immediately! I blinked!!!

Sometime during that blink and at the last possible moment the bird swerved round me, clipping my leg with her wing, flew threw the utility room and into the kitchen were my mother-in-laws dog 'Pippen' was waiting.

'Pippen' is a half sister of Pebbles, and like Pebbles is 12 years old. We have been looking after her for a couple of years now. When she arrived with us she was a mad and 'hyper' dog. Whereas Pebbles is slow and deliberate in her actions, Pippen is on the other end of the same scale, a 100mph racer.

So this unfortunate bird had flown straight into where Pippen was running around. I heard a bit of a flurry in the kitchen and was expecting to go and see Pippen standing, 'retriever' like with said bird in her mouth. But what greeted me was the bird sitting on the kitchen floor with Pippen's eyes glued to the bird's eyes, nose to nose or in this case nose to beak. No barking, no attack, no aggression, just calm, interested attention. I am convinced that even if I had not been there that the bird would have been left unharmed.

So after putting Pebbles down on the floor, I was able to pick up the young dove, who by this time was minus quite a few feathers that were strewn around the kitchen floor and take the bird outside where she flew off into the nearby trees.

I got a lesson from this encounter. Pippen reacted differently than I expected. Her bark was worse than her bite and I am convinced that she is a real softy at heart. I was sure the young dove was going to be in trouble but I was proved wrong.

I reflected that over the past couple of years Pippen has mellowed and become more like Pebbles and I do not believe that this mellowing is due to her age, she still can move at 100mph. I think it is down to the influence of Pebbles, the 'Mother Theresa of the dog world.

Makes you think that the more time we spend being close with our Lord and Saviour under His influence and His work on our hearts, we become more 'Christ like' in our natures and in our outlook. Putting into our lives His attributes, His love.

Joh 17:21 that they all may be one, as You, Father, are in Me, and I in You; that they also may be one in Us, that the world may believe that You sent Me.

Finally .......... a thought for to-day

Being Christlike is always in season

Pentecost

Today on this Sunday we celebrate one of the moat momentous days in Christian history, the day of Pentecost. Christmas and Easter are the well known days in the Christian calendar but Pentecost is largely ignored. Yet for those of us who know and believe that the Holy Spirit is indwelling us in our lives then it is a very significant day.

My prayer is for the Holy Spirit come to us and fill us -

Joh 16:7 Nevertheless I tell you the truth. It is to your advantage that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you; but if I depart, I will send Him to you.

For the Holy Spirit to teach us all things concerning our Lord and bring to remembrance his words -

Joh 14:26 But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all things that I said to you.

For the Holy Spirit to let us understand the heart of God our Father who will equip us for life in the Lord's service -

Joh 15:26 "But when the Helper comes, whom I shall send to you from the Father, the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me.

Finally .............. a thought for to-day

Let God's Word and Truth fill our minds, rule our hearts, and guide our tongues

Take Time to Smell the Roses

Yesterday I drove my car for a total of 9 hours. Two hours from our home in Northern Ireland down to Dublin in Southern Ireland. This was followed by a two hour high speed ferry crossing to Wales and then a 7 hour drive across the top of Wales, then a drive down the full length of Wales as far as Cardiff, and then over into England past the city of Bath to Bradford-on-Avon where my brother-in-law Ken and his wife Ann lives.

Driving alone on this long journey my directions were guided by satellite signals beamed from space. The route my satnav took me was through some beautiful parts of Wales, but every few miles I would hit a small town and have to slow down, and then there were the dreaded roundabouts. In the US you do not have too many roundabouts but in the UK they are the preferred means for controlling traffic at road junctions.

There was so many roundabouts and stoppages that I stopped and checked that the settings on my satnav were set for 'fastest route'! The satnav settings were set for the fastest route, but in hindsight if I had looked at a map and used my own judgement, I believe that I would have saved at least a hour on that journey. If I had gone into England much sooner and hit one of the main motorways going south the journey would have been a shorter one.

But thinking back, if I had indeed used a map, I 'might' have got to my destination sooner, but I would have missed out on the lovely scenery, especially a valley I went through in southern Wales. I would have missed 'driving' through the twists and turns in the road. I would have missed the small towns and the people walking through them. Instead I would have gone mile after mile on boring motorways.

Funny how as I go down the road of life I come across junctions, were my decisions on which way to turn, can have major impact on the various destinations I reach in my life. I like most people have found that between these junctions, and destinations the road of life has many twists and turns.

Life is so frantic, I want to get everywhere in the shortest time possible. I usually focus my attention on getting to the destination but the Lord wants me to enjoy the journey with him.

I still believe that satnavs are not to be fully trusted for car journey's but I have one navigator in life, Jesus that knows the road ahead in my life and in your life, a He knows the perfect route for each and every one of us.

He knows the junctions in our lives that have to be negotiated, he knows when we have to slow down, and when we can speed up. He knows the people who we will encounter on this journey of life, and he knows that if we let him drive and if we would only take our eyes of the immediate road ahead, there is beauty and wonder all around us.

Joh 10:10 The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.

How I love to rush ahead following my own direction and plan, under my own steam, while the Lord asks me to walk with Him under His loving care and guidance.

Neh 9:12 Moreover You led them by day with a cloudy pillar, And by night with a pillar of fire, To give them light on the road Which they should travel.

Finally ......... a thought for to-day

If you know Jesus, you'll never travel alone

Our 'wee' Dog

Being away from home quite a bit with my job I have been asked a few times if the kids love to see me come home. I can honestly say that to this day I get the most wonderful reception as I enter the front door on a Friday evening. Our 'wee' dog Pebbles loves to see me coming home. She runs rings round me, jumps up on me and generally goes mad for a few minutes.

When the kids were at home it was a "Hi dad" and a quick kiss before they went about their activities, normal life as far as they were concerned. Pebbles on the other hand would follow me around for the next half hour or so just wanting to be stroked, to welcome me back home. She still does it to this day. She is trustworthy, loyal, kind, quite spirited, a dog with a calm nature, but most of all a loving dog.

Now with that last paragraph you would think that the poor dog is neglected by the rest of the family, by the way that she greets me! That paints a wrong picture. This dog is loved, cherished and cared for beyond what anyone could consider as normal. She has pride of place on Hazel's lap each night and when the girls are at home it is more cuddles, more attention, more care.

Pebbles is a miniature Schnauzer with some physical problems. She is 12 years old prone to fits, now controlled by drugs and by my estimate she 95% blind. She had problems with her eyes for a few years and Hazel treated those eyes day and daily, to hold back the degradation that was taking place in both eyes.

For some reason that we cannot fathom, she went into a Anaphylactic shock some time last year, and was at death's door for over a week. She spent that time at the vet's and with his care and lots of prayer she was well enough to return home. Unfortunately, her eyes were not treated during that time and she lost her sight. A few months later we had to have one of her eyes removed and now there is a hole right in the centre of the remaining eye, but we are convinced that she can see things (shadows) when it is bright enough. I am amazed how she navigates around things in the house, and seldom bumps into anything. You would never know that she is nearly blind by the way she acts.

We have spent a fortune on our wee dog, what with medicines and vet bills etc, but she is part of the family and has been a real blessing to us all since we got her as a puppy. So we will continue to do all we can for her, for the rest of her remaining years. Giving back what she has freely given to us ........Love.

In work I have a poster on the wall that says "Lord make me the type of person my dog thinks I am".

So finally ............. a thought for to-day must be

Lord, make me the type of person my dog thinks I am!

What's in a Name

After a couple of days rest feel like my 'old' self. I have the house to myself to-day and I am presently just watching the birds at the bird feeder in the garden.

My eldest daughter has just phoned to say that she has passed one of her bank exams. It was something that she was worried about for a couple of weeks. Once again it made me think that everyone has some form of stress and pressure in day to day living. Pressure in work, pressure at home, pressure from others forcing you to do what thy want you to do.

I think of the pressures that our children face day and daily, to conform to the worlds standards. The pressure must be immense. It has taken me years to realise, that it is only by God's love and protection, and a parents love, can our children have any hope of standing firm on what they know and have been taught to be, the 'correct' way to live their lives.

The role of the family unit has a key part to play in a child's development into a young adult. The trust, respect and love between parents and their children are vital if our children are to mature into the kind of people that we would like them to be. But more importantly into the kind of people who know the Lord and walk in his steps.

My daughter Gillian (who's flat I have just cleared last weekend) told me a few weeks ago that her friends thought it strange that she called me 'dad' and my wife Hazel 'mum', and they were surprised to hear that my other two girls do the same. Apparently the 'cool thing' now is to use the parents first name, when they became teenagers. I have no problem with that, for other teenagers / young adults to call their parents by their first name, but what would I feel like if my girls started to call me Trevor? Call me un-cool, but I know I would hate it!

I was blessed more than Gillian will ever know, when she said she could never consider calling me anything but Dad or Daddy. Funny how a simple sentence can mean so much. Sentimental old fool some might say! Guilty! as charged I would reply, with a heart lifted by her words.

So what's in a name? Gillian's comment made me realise that this name, this title of 'DAD', 'DADDY' or 'MUM', 'MUMMY' are names and titles of honour. I did not esteem my title until she told me this story, and what it meant to her to call me Dad.

Makes you realise that our father in heaven must love it when we lovingly call him 'ABBA', 'PAPA'.

Lord, Help me fulfil the intent of the thought for to-day.

Finally ............ a thought for to-day

A godly parent is a child's best guide to God.

Things

Home safe in Ireland, 470 miles under my belt for part one of the journey. My comment in the last post on me being a not so fit manual labourer proved well founded. I was exhausted after all the driving, packing, driving on Saturday. The journey up to Scotland was uneventful. Being a bank holiday weekend in the UK the usual lorries and trucks were replaced by cars pulling caravans, boats, trailer tents etc. All going to either the Lake District in England or further north to Scotland.

It was a good job I took the car up to 'help' Gillian remove her stuff from the flat. The car was full by the time we had finished packing and there was plenty left over for her Scottish friends to look after, until she returns to Scotland next February. How so much 'stuff' had been accumulated over the three years she spent in Stirling I will never know. Still it was an improvement over her sister Jennifer who required three car loads when she removed the contents of her flat at the end of her degree course.

It got me thinking how we accumulate things in our lives over the years. (Not when I was carrying the boxes, then I was more concerned with the condition of my back). I got to thinking that some things we acquire are useful for many years, and many other things we use for a short time and then becomes clutter.

Now I am a person who does not like to throw out ANYTHING. Whereas Hazel my wife is the opposite. If an item is no longer of any use? It's gone! (I like to keep myself useful)!!!!

As a child Gillian would ask me "Tell me what it was like in the olden days daddy"? So I am about to go back into the 'olden' days. When I was 15 I left home to start an apprenticeship working for the Royal Navy as a Airframe / Engine Fitter in Belfast, and then three years later went to England as a Technician Apprentice for a further two years.

I look at 15 year olds nowadays and looking back I wonder how I ever survived those times, I knew nothing about life all. We have a saying in Ireland about somebody who knows nothing about life or a particular subject! We say that person "Is wet behind the ears"!

Well I was really wet behind the ears, a potential lamb to the slaughter. But, little did I know it, the Lord was there protecting and guiding me on this start of my working life adventure, even though I did not recognise it as his doing back then)! I must tell of the events that led my to getting my apprenticeship in another story.

Since the completion of my apprenticeship I have kept all my tools and all my apprentice notebooks. Over the years Hazel has asked me "do you need these books"? to which I would usually reply "Yes! you never know when they might become useful". But a couple of years ago she made an 'executive decision' and threw them all out without telling me. How did I find out? Did I eventually find that I needed them, never having looked at them once since 1970? No, I noticed that they were not were I had left them and then enquired of their whereabouts. I realised that I would never have never looked at them, and that they were unlikely to become a family heirloom and I found it funny, not annoying that they were gone.

We hold onto so much clutter in our lives. I pass by a wetsuit hanging in the store room upstairs in the house I am sure the rubber has perished on the 35 year old wetsuit, but I will never try it on as know it would not fit me. I have gained a few pounds since I last wore it over 25 years ago. OK! I have gained LOTS of pounds since then.

But it is the clutter in our minds, that is more important than the cultter in our possessions. We feed our minds and thoughts through daily news bulletins, the daily 'world' view focusing people on self, the adverts an television promoting self advancement, self pleasing, self serving, self over all others.

The focus on improving the outward appearance rather than the inner man. Young girls trying to look like these 'stick thin' models, young men trying to emulate their 'idols', be they pop singers, movie stars or sports personalities.

Psa 24:4 He who has clean hands and a pure heart, Who has not lifted up his soul to an idol, Nor sworn deceitfully.

The world system promoting other God's before the true God in the minds of men and women.

Deu 11:16 Take heed to yourselves, lest your heart be deceived, and you turn aside and serve other gods and worship them,

The only thing of REAL lasting value that we should desire to possess is the Lord himself. All things that we cherish to-day will eventually burn. Our Lord is our greatest possession, he is our salvation, he is our inheritance.

Finally ............ a thought for to-day

No matter where you go, God goes with you.

Daughters

Being the proud father of three wonderful daughters, all saved by the grace of God, I would do anything for each and every one of them. The Lord has blessed me with a wonderful wife and three great children, or should I say young women.

Psa 127:4 Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one's youth.

I look back over the years, I see the hand of God on their lives. Last year my eldest daughter Jennifer is now working as a graduate trainee in one of the major banks in Dublin in Southern Ireland.

One of my twin girls, Amanda is graduating next month with a degree in Theology. She is also getting married in July this year, and then will return to Belfast Bible College to study for a Masters degree in Theology.

Finally, there is Gillian my other twin. I am preparing to travel to Scotland tomorrow to meet up with Gillian. She is studying at Stirling University in Scotland a mix of Biblical studies and politics and is also finishing her degree next week. She will be returning home to Ireland next Thursday the Lord willing.

This next few days could have been a very sad time for her leaving her friends she has made in the church that has adopted her as one of their own. The Lord has blessed her with Godly friends looking out got her welfare.

Pro 12:26 The righteous should choose his friends carefully, For the way of the wicked leads them astray.

But this sad leaving has been put back for a couple of years. Again the Lord has blessed her by allowing her to return to Stirling University next February, to start a post graduate course studying for a MSc degree in Social Work.

So why the long trip north to meet up with Gillian? I am her 'flat contents removal team', one car, one 'not so' fit manual labourer with two arms and a desire to help.

As I write this she is meant to be deciding what items to leave with friends in Scotland and what to ship home with me to Ireland. I hope she gets the balance right. Too little, and it will have been a wasted journey and too much, well that creates it's own problem.

Interestingly, all these events in the lives of my three daughters can all be traced back to the hand of God. The jobs, the degree courses, the husband to be, are all the result of the work of the Lord. Each event has twists and turns that can only be attributed to divine interventions. I give him the praise and glory.

Lord thank you for your love and care. Thank you for family, thank you for love, thank you for your saving grace.

Finally .............. a thought for to-day

Because God gives us everything, we owe Him all our praise

My Testimony - Part 7 - Answered Prayer

Well! A couple of weeks ago, I said in this blog that I had to give my testimony to some people at work. I gave my testimony today to the small fellowship group, and I am so glad that I had been documenting my testimony in this blog! It has made me re-live the work the Lord has done in my life.

I have told very few people of that Saturday on the prophetic discipleship week end away. Even less people about the anointing of the Holy Spirit.

Going back to that weekend away, I remember that I was a bit subdued instead of being elated after the anointing of the Holy Spirit. I was told by the visiting pastor that I looked different, but I was wondering 'what happened to me'. Again I should have told those people with me what happened to me, but once again I just kept quiet and worked things out in my own mind. The Lord by his grace helped me understand.

Later that night as I lay on my bed I began to thank the Lord for what he had done for me that day, and then the Lord revealed the meaning of the vision that Jenson had earlier that day. In that vision he said that he saw a vision of a black bell, except that it was not a bell. This bell was behind a pane of frosted glass, and that the glass shattered to reveal the bell.

My mind was immediately taken back to the time that my great grandmother prayed for me as a young child. I remembered her standing there dressed as she always did in a long black dress that went down to her ankles. The only other colour of clothing showing was a white collar of a blouse round her neck. She did look like a black bell in shape, but the real clincher was that the family always addressed her as Granny Bell. Bell was her married surname. The glass shattering was the revelation to me that this was the answer to her prayer, that she prayed over me 40+ years ago asking the Lord to save me, I now knew that prayer was answered.

I encourage all of you who are praying for loved ones, maybe you have children who are a bit wild, maybe your spouse is far from the Lord! Continue, continue and continue to pray for their salvation, for it is in the Lord’s timing, by his sovereign will that he answers such prayers. It will be wonderful to meet with my great grandmother some day in eternity. But all honour must go to the Lord to whom I give all my thanks and praise.

The next day (Sunday) at this weekend away, I had told Hazel my wife what had happened to me, and she said "I wonder if the Lord has a word for me"? He certainly had, but that is her testimony and not mine, but it did lead as a step to her salvation. Now all my family have come to know and acknowledge the Lord as our saviour.

You will have noticed in this testimony that I did not tell you when I was 'reborn' and the answer is I do not know the date nor the time. Some people can say I was born on such a date and reborn on this date. I cannot do that, but I know in my heart that the Lord has saved me.

Since then I have been up on the mountain top a few times in the walk with the Lord and have spent quite some time down in some valleys. I can testify that when the world drags me into it's clutches and the enemy attacks that the Lord is always faithful to 'put my feet back on solid rock'.

My journey to the narrow gate is not always smooth. I have a tendency to please my family and fellow men before pleasing the Lord. I also have a discipline problem where my mind and focus flits from thing to thing. This is a big barrier to establishing regular quiet time with the Lord.

But the desire of my heart more than anything else, is to draw close to him, to walk where he walks. But I find by my own power this is impossible. The Lord knows of this desire of mine and a few months ago I read this article about keeping a journal, at the same time I purchased some excellent journalling software.

Then I felt compelled to learn to touch type after years of using one finger on each hand to punch the keyboard. So I have reached an average speed of 40 WPM with a 96% level of accuracy (told you I like facts and data)! I will never get a job as a secretary but I can now type with my eyes closed!!!!!

Then I felt it was right to start a blog to share my walk, and even if nobody read it, I was talking to the Lord and spending quality time with him, writing what was on my heart. I have been blessed and encouraged by you the reader of my thoughts. Thank you for all your kind comments, but once again it is the Lord's hand at work in my life.

So here we are. Every breath is a gift from God, health, family, job all huge blessings. Wonderful wife and a great life. ALL due to him, the one who loved me so much that he paid my debt of sin. One who loves you so much that he paid your debt as well.

Following the Lord is about relationship not religion. It is about love not rules. It is about doing what we were designed to do. Love the Lord our God with all our heart, with all our soul, with all our strength and with all our minds.

Mighty Lord, might Saviour, I am a sinner saved by YOUR grace.

Finally ............. a thought for to-day

To give your life to Christ now is to keep it forever

My Testimony - Part 6 - The Curse Removed

At the end of the prophetic discipleship course was a weekend retreat. On the Friday night we were having a 'getting to know you meeting' followed by a service lead by a guest pastor who was from the south of England and his wife.

I remember talking to someone and ended up telling them the story of my great grandmother, her miraculous healing and how she prayed for me as a young boy. I also told this person that the family was scared to tell her anything that she would disapprove of such as going to the cinema, no matter what the film was it was off limits in her mind.

I told this person that she would never ask a person she met "How are you", she would always ask "Are you saved"? We had a laugh about this during which I had this thought come to mind. It went like this "Actually Trevor she was not enquiring about the person's physical health but their spiritual health"! Oh! I remember how this brought me up short.

I proceeded to the back of the room before the service started and took the last chair on the back row, right next to the exit door. Then internally my mind started to scream "get out of here, leave now". "You do not fit in here, you are right beside the door, no-one will see you go". I wanted to leave, and was just about to get up when I heard the guest pastor's wife say to the assembled congregation "There is someone in this room who wants to leave, don't do it! Stay". I expected all eyes to turn to look at me the 'outsider' but none did and I did stay on for the service.

I had a decision to make go home or stay for the rest of the weekend. But after the word from the pastors wife, I decided to stay, God must have not finished with me. The next day the prophetic discipleship course members congregated in a small beautiful chapel. We all sat around the room with our backs to the wall and after prayer people began to give words of knowledge and explain visions they were seeing. One girl turned to me and said that see saw me in a deep sea divers suit. She said she felt the Lord was saying that I could go as deep with him as I wanted to.

Another young man called Jenson said that he saw a vision of a black bell, except that it was not a bell which was behind a pane of glass, and that the glass shattered to reveal the bell. That vision meant nothing to anyone in the room.

Then it came to Glynis the course leader, and she said she saw a vision of a multi-coloured cockrel with the word Masonic written above it. Bang! My memory sped back to the time when I was about twenty one. I was persuaded by a friend that to progress in work you needed connections, and he thought that the best way was by joining a Masonic lodge. So I was accepted into the local lodge and went through the first initiation rights.

I hated it, when the initiation was over I swore that I would never go back to that dark, evil place. But, I forgot that I had taken an oath during that initiation process, an oath that I had forgot about but the Lord had not.

When I told the people that I had joined the Masonic order many years ago, and the visiting pastor said that they needed to pray for me. That afternoon while the majority of the people on the course were doing other things I found myself in the middle of this small chapel surrounded by four or five people. The visiting pastor explained that the Masons were indeed influenced by demonic activity and that my oath was quite literally a death sentence.

They proceeded to lay hands on me and I remember quite vividly in my mind I took a scroll of paper, ripped it into small pieces while I renounced my oath. I asked the Lord for his forgiveness and mercy and then from the top of my head as the words left my lips this 'tingle' like I had never experienced before in my life proceeded to move down from the crown of my head to the middle of my body. I said nothing to anyone, but I knew it was the Holy Spirit that had come upon me and that my curse was broken. Praise and honour to his power and to his name.

Finally ............ a thought for to-day

The wonder of it all--just to think that God loves me

My Testimony - Part 5 - The Prophetic Discipleship Course

About 6 years ago during our 'checking out' process at the Derby Community Church my wife spotted a leaflet about a Prophetic Discipleship Course about to start in the church. She said "That is something that would interest you"! She was right! after what happened during the Alpha course concerning the gifts of the spirit I wanted to know more about these gifts of the spirit.

On a side note: It is interesting that as I was outlining this part of my testimony I began to think about my motivation for saying I wanted to know more about these gifts of the spirit. I began to question if the prime reason was for manifestations of gifts of the spirit or was it to build a relationship with the Lord? I have to admit that at that stage back then, it was probably the former statement I wanted to see more evidence.

I have been unhappy with myself about this for the past couple of days but as I was driving to work to-day I was listening to an audio tape of the book 'More than a Carpenter' and the speaker spoke the words that Jesus spoke concerning the greatest commandment. This hit home.

Mat 22:37 Jesus said to him, 'YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.'

It was as if the Lord said to me, loving is more than using your heart it is also loving me with your mind. The speaker on the CD then went on to say that ours is not meant to be a blind faith. God has given us plenty of evidence of his reality if we but use our minds.

However, I know that if I was around in the time of Jesus I would have been a Thomas. I would have needed to see the evidence of the nail pierced hands and the hole made by the spear in the side of our Lord before believing. The Lord knows everything about me, and by his grace and by his plan, not my plan, back then six years ago he was about to deal with my requirement for evidence.

Getting back to my testimony I still attend the Derby Community Church and go to one of their small groups (in fact the small group met tonight in my home here in Derby). But then as of this day I am not a member of Derby Community Church, as my home church is back in Ireland.

During this time I am talking about I had attended the church only two to three times. I copied the phone number from the Prophetic Discipleship course leaflet and the next day phoned 'Glynis' the lady who was the organiser / leader of the course. How I was accepted onto the course was a divine arrangement. A few phone calls by Glynis to the pastor of the church and I was allowed to join the course. I was told that this was unheard of and I was thrilled to be allowed to take part.

I was brought up as a Presbyterian and the prophetic gifts were not really discussed or their use promoted. So I went into this prophetic course 'blind' in more ways than one. The course was wonderful, people welcoming and friendly. They all had prophetic giftings ranging from speaking in tongues, seeing visions, bringing words of knowledge etc.while I sat learning but 'experiencing' nothing at all! All that is except I got a vision from God. I asked the Lord for a vision and I got one.

How did I know it was a vision? I had never experienced anything like this before, I knew it was not a normal dream. Dreams like this did not have such intensity and clarity.

A few days after asking the Lord for a vision I awoke one morning but I was not awake.(Now that is an Irish statement if ever there was one). I was just on the edge between being fully awake when right before my eyes I saw a picture of a filthy spray gun.

It was paint spray gun the metal hidden behind a layer of black grime. I knew right away that this stood for me, this spray gun was me, covered in sin and filth that I had picked up over the years.

This spray gun was of a type that I was familiar with for spray painting. The pot beneath the gun held the paint, but that is not what attracted my attention. My eyes were drawn to the handle of the gun and attached to that handle was the 'oil filter'. I cannot explain how intensely I examined that oil filter.

In spray painting compressed air is used to force out the paint from the paint pot into the spray gun nozzle. This compressed air contains traces of oil picked up from the air compressor. Left unchecked this oil can contaminate the paint and therefore affect the paint finish. So there is normally an oil filter located somewhere between the paint gun and the air compressor to filter out this oil.

This oil filter in my vision was made of glass and I could 'see' that it contained a mixture of brown coloured oil and water. My focus was fully on this small glass container when the oil and water mixture turned into a crystal clear liquid. The purest liquid I had ever seen. Then I woke up.

I did not need any explanation about what I had seen. The transformation of the oil and water was the effect of the Holy Spirit cleaning me up on the inside. The garbage is still coming into my life through day to day living but the Holy Spirit, washes me continuously.

I believe that the spray gun was not working, and I have asked the Lord on numerous occasions if it will ever work. In my vision there was no hand directing the gun or pulling the trigger to operate the spray gun, it stood alone. I trust that at some time in my life, if I allow the Lord to use me, then the spray gun might work to proclaim God's message of salvation.

The outside of the spray gun may be filthy but if the inside is purified and in the hand of a master painter it can produce a wonderful finish. Good spray painting has little to do with the quality of the spray gun but everything to do with the skill of the painter adjusting the spray gun settings to produce different spray patterns. Holding the spray gun at the optimum distance away from the surface to be painted while moving the spray gun in at a speed and tempo in the right direction to produce a quality finish. Lord use me to deliver the word of your shed blood> the blood that covers the sin of the world.

At the end of the prophetic course there was a weekend away at a retreat. Malcomb one of the other leaders of the course gave me a prophetic word that something wonderful was about to transpire for me on that weekend. He was right, a curse was lifted from my life and I got filled with the Holy Spirit for the first time, and I realised the full impact of my great grandmother's prayer for my salvation as a child.That weekend was the closest I will get to heaven in this life.

Finally ....................... a thought for to-day

The conversion of a soul is the miracle of a moment; the growth of a saint is the task of a lifetime.

My Testimony - Part 4 - A Big Regret

I went on to complete the Alpha course. It was during this period of time I would ask the Lord a question, open my bible and there was the answer to my question. I cannot say that I was following what some people might think of as correct procedures in reaching out to God, But I can only suppose that back then the Lord was still 'getting my attention',

Back then, as it still is to this present day, I still find it difficult to concentrate during prayer time, and back then as happens now the enemy of my soul is always in full attack mode. During prayer my mind seems to flit all over the place.

One particular night as I tried to pray my mind was full of chatter’. That goes no way close to explaining what was going on in my head. It was not a normal level of random thoughts but a screaming mass of noise. I thought that my head would explode.

I cried out to the Lord for help and immediately my mind cleared. Now that word 'cleared' does not adequately explain the experience. No noise, nothing. Pure silence. Intense clarity.

I realised that my mind was sharper than it ever had been. I was amazed, and I knew that the Lord had done this for me. From chaos & confusion to peace and tranquillity. It was a ‘twinkling of an eye’ moment.

Then I did the most amazing thing, a thing I regret to this day, a thing that pains me every time I think about it. I said "Thank you Lord" and got up off my knees and returned to the 'old man' status. What might have happened next I will never know!

Why? Why did I do such a stupid thing? I cannot answer. What might have happened next, always comes to mind when I recall this event. I have said, sorry many times to the Lord, when I remembered this event, and writing this down makes me say ‘sorry Lord’ one more time.

During the summer holidays my girls (my daughters) came over to England and stayed with me and my wife travelled over each weekend. I knew that the difference between the church back home and the local churches (including the one in which I attended the Alpha course) was huge. The differences were in praise and worship the teaching, they wanted life in a service, and I must admit so did I.

Following a bit of 'surfing the net' I discovered that there was another church in Derby in England that ran 'Alpha' courses called the 'Community Church Derby'. My wife Hazel & I 'checked out' this church before the girls arrived for the summer. The praise and worship was wonderful and best of all the people were wonderful.

I had found my second spiritual home, A place & people that would have a huge impact on me as I started our on my walk with the Lord. How big an impact I will cover in the next couple of posts.

Finally .......... a thought for to-day

Salvation is given, not earned.

My Testimony - Part 3 - Getting My Full Attention

Before I continue with my testimony I have to make a comment.

I can appreciate that some people who might read my testimony, could think that it is fanciful and that it is not true. You might even think that what I will talk about in this post is something that God would not do. But I believe that God is interested in the minutia elements in our life and will reach us in any way he can. As you will find out it took a very unusual event to make me wake up, to the reality of a living God.

I take the person of the Lord and his love seriously, and do not underestimate his power, and in my postings I seek to honour him.

I can only say, that what I write about, is what actually happened to me. You will either believe me, or you will not. My testimony is the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. With God's help I will honour his saving grace in my life.

To put things in context I think I need to explain a bit more about me, and what makes me tick. The relevance of me telling you about this will become apparent as I tell you my story.

For over 20 years my work involves using data to make decisions. The desire and drive for clarity of evidence, the use of structured problem solving methods are what I do on a day to day basis as part of my job. Another part of my job involves teaching engineers the tools and techniques, that use data to solve complicated business / engineering problems.

So you could say that my mantra is 'show me the data'. I like to see the data and to prove statistically that something is real. It is even better if I am there to observe the process that produces that data. I am a firm believer in the phenomena of cause and effect, and that is how the Lord grabbed my attention, events that would 'prove' to me, that He was real.

As part of the Alpha course I talked about in the previous post, there is a session on the gifts of the spirit. Following on from the watching a video about that topic, I went into a small group to discuss what I had heard.

To open the conversation the small group leader, called Piers, started with a sentence that I will never forget. I could see that he was finding it difficult to start the small group in conversation.

He mumbled a bit and then said something that was so off the wall, so way out, that I will remember it for the rest of my life. He said "What if I were to say to you that you woke up this morning, and you were in such a hurry to get out you you ripped your new Marks & Spencer's shirt on the bedroom door handle, and you have a sore big toe".

I have to admit that I was amazed at this sentence, but for all the wrong reasons. If I could have said "Ugh", I would have. All the rest of the small group looked just as bemused as I did.

In our small group was the minister of the church, and he proceeded to ask in an incredulous tone of voice. "What did you just say"?

All eyes turned to see what the Piers would say, and he repeated what he had just said. "What if I were to say to you that you woke up this morning, and you were in such a hurry to get out you you ripped your new Marks & Spencer's shirt on the bedroom door handle, and you have a sore big toe".

As he finished speaking I could see that he was in full discomfort mode, and he seemed to be thinking what to say next, when the minister said. "That happened to me to-day".

Now all eyes turned to look at him. He explained that earlier on that day he got up and was in a hurry to get out of his house to go to an important meeting. He told us that he had indeed put on a new Marks and Spencer's shirt and had caught the sleeve of the shirt on the bedroom door handle and ripped the shirt.

Then he proceeded to remove his shoe while explaining that he hurt his big toe playing indoor soccer two nights before. He did not have to tell us that it was very painful as he showed us all a blackening toenail, on a toe that was much bigger than it should have been.

Everyone was stunned into silence. Piers had just spoken what I know now to be a 'word of knowledge'. You had to be there to see that this was something that was spontaneous and wonderful. No big theological revelation, but just knowledge of a couple of everyday events that only God and the minister knew about.

Could it have been a staged event? I hear you ask? No! You could 'feel' Piers discomfort, and the minister I had come to know as a faithful servant of the Lord. The look of embarrasment on Peirs face when the words left his lips left me in no doubt, that this was real and not staged.

I was shocked because I knew that the probability of this being put down to pure random chance events was out of the question.

Think about it, think of the accuracy of the word of knowledge:

The correct day
The correct part of the day
The fact that the minister was in a hurry
The correct type of garment
The correct make of garment
The correct door in the house
The correct object that damaged the shirt (door handle)
The correct explanation of the damage to the garment (ripped)
The same person having a sore big toe

The Lord knew that that event would grab my attention. This was a 'Divine' moment and I went home that night determined to seek this all knowing God, not fully appreciating that he was always there with me, and that had planned further revelations of his love and care for me over the following months.

I have over time told this event to a number of people and I can say that the reactions have been from full acceptance to the look of 'are you for real'. But again all I can say is this really happened. It also told me that God has a wonderful sense of humour, and used this 'funny' set of events to catch my attention in a profound way. I have found that some people think that God is only interested in the 'big stuff', but I have found and I believe that God is interested in the 'small stuff' that makes up our daily lives and well as the 'big stuff' that can impact our lives. Let us take everything to the Lord in prayer.

I thank you my Lord. for your love and continuing care.

1Co 12:8 for to one is given the word of wisdom through the Spirit, to another the word of knowledge through the same Spirit.

Finally ............. a thought for to-day

Mankind's limited potential highlights God's limitless power

My Testimony - Part 2 - The Journey Begins

Fast forward 40 years and you find me happily married with three fantastic children. My wife Hazel and I had Jennifer and then 13 months later we had our twins Amanda and Gillian. It was when they were about 12 or 13 years old that I got offered a job at Rolls-Royce in England. (Before you ask the answer is "No I do not own one"! I work for the aero engine part of Rolls-Royce). This meant that since then I worked in England during the week and returned home to Northern Ireland at the weekend.

Amanda our 'middle' child started attending a church in our home town during the week, to learn the guitar. Then she started to attend the church services on a Sunday. Then she 'got saved'.

I periodically attended another church with my wife and it was out of curiosity that we both went along to see what was so special in this church. What was special was that we both started to cry during the praise and worship. Why cry? We had never cried at any service before so why now? Why did the worship service have this effect? I know now that it was the work of the Holy Spirit, drawing us closer to the Lord.

Over time I felt at home in this Pentecostal Church in my home town. As the family started to attend the church my other girls soon gave their lives to the Lord.

At the same time when I was working during the weeks that I was in England, I started to attend an 'Alpha' course, run by my local 'Church of England' church. This Alpha course was for people searching for the meaning of life and I met that entrance qualification.

The focus of the teaching and the subsequent discussions was on the reality of the Lord and the work of the Holy Spirit. Little did I know that in this course God did something that would stop me in my tracks and confirm in my mind and then in my heart that God is real and active right now. This event that I will cover in my next post was the prime event that started my walk to the Narrow Gate.

Finally ............. a thought for to-day

Venture into the unknown with faith in God

My Testimony - Part 1 - The Early Years

I was brought up in a small town called Dromore in County Down, Northern Ireland. My family went to First Dromore Presbyterian church. Christianity has been part and parcel of life in Dromore dating back to the time of Saint Patrick. The picture is of a Celtic cross that still stands beside the cathedral in Dromore to this day. It dates back to the 9th century. Pointing all that time to the cross of Jesus Christ.

On childhood related memories I have one memory that has been etched in my mind by the Lord. I went on a few occasions to stay with my paternal grandmother during my summer holidays. She and my grandfather, lived in a big rambling house. In my memory it contained big rooms, lots of rooms.

In one of these rooms lived a very old lady. My great grandmother 'Granny Bell' who was well into there 90's was being looked after by my grandmother, and as I passed her room one day, spied me passing and looking intently at me, called out "Are you saved?"

I was only about 8 or 9 at the time and did not know what she meant, so I said "I don't know"! I still remember this as if it were yesterday, as she ushered me into her room, made me kneel down at the side of her bed, and as she knelt beside me she prayed and she prayed. It was a fervent prayer!

I know in my heart that this was a prayer for my salvation, and it was many years later that it was answered. God's timing is not always our timing, and in his sovereign will God answered the prayer of this righteous woman, many years after she had gone to be with him.

Just a 'wee' bit more on my great grandmother. She was a direct descendant of 'Jenny Geddes' (worth a search on Google for that story). She would pray for hours on end, and so fervent were her prayers that my grandfather often had to ask her to be quiet, as she prayed on into the middle of the night, so that he could get to sleep.

How she became a prayer warrior is a remarkable story, but true testimony to God's mercy. As a young woman she was partially disabled in one of her legs, unable to walk up a flight of stairs, having to pull herself up stairs on her hands and knees. She had seven children and when her husband suddenly died, she was left with a young family and a small farm to run.

Her disability meant that she could not run the farm successfully and at the point of desperation she prayed with a sacred promise, for her affliction to be taken from her. Her sacred promise was that she would serve the Lord for the rest of her life.

Shortly after that prayer she fell into a coma for two weeks, and was thought to be near deaths door. It was my grandmother who found her cooking breakfast early one morning, standing on two perfect legs. Her disabled leg had been fully restored. That woman kept her promise, and served the Lord faithfully until the day she died. I will talk about Granny Bell again later in my testimony, and how I know that her prayer was answered.

Jas 5:16 Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

Please Note: The fervent prayer of a righteous woman also avails much!

Finally ........... a thought for to-day

Faith and love are vital to effective prayer

My Testimony - Introduction

I got a pleasant surprise to-day, I thought that I was due to give a talk to the Christian fellowship group that meets each Thursday at dinner time in work. I once again relied on my memory only to find that it is my turn next week and not to-day.

Why was I pleasantly surprised? Well, coming back from holiday I was not fully prepared to talk about 'numbers in the bible' and my opening line the the assembled people before me would have been an apology for this lack of preparedness. SO I get an extra week to refine my work for this talk.

But then I remembered that the following week I am giving my testimony. Now that is something that I have never talked about for more than 5 minutes and I have a 30 minute time slot to fill.

To be honest, I think I really need the Lord to remind me, of the memorials, the Ebenezer memorial stones, marking the many instances of mercy and help that I have received from the Lord, on my journey to faith.

1Sa 7:12 Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen, and called its name Ebenezer, saying, "Thus far the LORD has helped us."

So what better way but to Journal my story. In reality it is the Lord's story on how he saved me. So over the following days, with the Lord's help, I will chart my walk, so that I miss nothing of significance for my testimony in two weeks time.

As I typed in the title to this post, I saw that it read. 'My Yestimony'. That is what it was, that is what it is, my 'YES' to my Saviour's call.

Lord bring to my mind your blessings, the times I was very aware of your hand on my life.

How from a small child you have blessed me. How I owe it all, everything I am, everything I possess and hold dear in my life from my wonderful wife, my beautiful Godly children, my friends, my family, all can be traced back to your love and blessing. I am so blessed. Thank you my Lord.

Finally ............ a thought for to-day

Faith in Christ is not just a single step but a life of walking with Him

A 'hand' but not as we know it

We see some 'strange' verses in the Bible. This is one of them.

Pro 30:28 The spider skillfully grasps with its hands, And it is in kings' palaces.

I had a look to see if spiders around my home had 'hands' and I came across this picture. No microscopes three to four thousand years ago. This is the 'hand' of a common garden spider. This is how it clings to and moves along it's web in your home, in king's palaces and in my home, (if they ever get a chance to weave them with my wife Hazel's keen eyesisight and efficient dusting techniques).

How great is our God. In the big universe and the microscopic worlds around us. Every word the Lord has given us in his word has meaning and contains a truth.

Finally ......... a thought for to-day

Through prayer, finite man draws upon the power of the infinite God.

Anger

How is it that small things, in the bigger scheme of things can consume your every waking thought. Day-to-day things that 'happen' to us, can have such negative effects on our peace, and affect our walk with God.

If people take actions that affect us in a negative way, the normal response is to get annoyed, then upset, finally angry. Before you know it, you are railing about the injustices you see in the situation. We are expert at seeing how inconsiderate and thoughtless other people actions are when they directly affect us.

Our minds go into overdrive and we play and re-play the event that caused the anger over and over. I usually find that well after the 'event' ,when I am in post mortem mode, I come up with some pretty snappy 'one liners', really excellent 'put downs' that would have made my point, and allowed me to gain the moral victory that from my viewpoint I so richly deserved.

It is usually then that I am reminded, that I am supposed to love the person who has hurt or offended me, I am meant to turn the other cheek, I am meant to forgive before I can be forgiven. Now that is hard, especially when your internal justice system, has judged the other person guilty.

Eph 4:31 Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamour, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice.

If we walk in the spirit the bitterness and anger we feel in the natural will be replaced with a peace. Blessed are the peace makers. Anger takes away our peace, and our blessing, and gives direct access for Satan to put his poison, into our thoughts.

Col 3:8 But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice, blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth.

It is a choice we make to put off all these things, and to put on the armour of God. Allowing us to be slow to get angry thereby maintaining our peace.

Pro 19:11 The discretion of a man makes him slow to anger, And his glory is to overlook a transgression.

Lord give us the ability to recognise when we are about to 'get angry' and give us the wisdom to deal with these situations to reflect your life in us.

Finally ............ a thought for to-day

Open your ears to God before you open your mouth to others.

Part 7 Self-Will

Do I insist on doing it MY WAY?

I have a tendency to use that line from the song sung by Frank Sinatra (with a slight personal modification) which now says "I'll do it my way". In the Lord's prayer we say "Thy Kingdom come and thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven". It's a choice we have to make to submit our wills to him.

What word comes easiest to a child. NO! It pains me, if I see children rebelling against their parents. I see this in supermarkets, in car parks, everywhere.

We teach (sometimes force) our children to try to be the best, to beat the other children at all costs, to be top of the class. Get what you want, make yourself heard.

We even have people pay good money to have someone tell us to 'visualise yourself being successful', and unfortunately I see this type of mentality and teaching creeping into many churches. Especially the television evangelists. Now, I do admit there are some God anointed pastors preaching the word on television channels. People like Pastor Charles Stanley from Intouch Ministries comes to mind, but there are too many 'show business pastors', lovers of self image and not lovers of souls.

The 'name it and claim it' pastors, the type of pastors who say "Sow 1 dollar to get 100 dollars back" type pastors. Pastors who fleece the sheep rather than care for and shepherd their sheep. (I feel my blood start to boil ,and as I have high blood pressure it is not a good to have 'boiling blood', so I will stop there). Do they not realise that they will be judged more sternly for their sins?

God's will is not being fully done on this earth as YET. But a day is coming when it will all be put right. Until that day, may we follow the example of our Lord, when he daily submitted himself to the will of the Father. He said he did nothing on his own initiative, but only that which he saw the father doing, and heard the father saying (John 5:19,20,30). "Not my will but thy will be done" was the Lord's prayer. May it become ours.

Finally .......... a thought for to-day

When you grasp, you lose; when you give to God, you gain.

Part 6 Self-Sufficiency

Do I feel that I don't need to know God, to know God's love?

The majority of the world has this attitude to God. Humanists in the UK pay for adverts to be put on busses with a slogan that says "There's probably no God! Now stop worrying and enjoy your life".

Notice what the humanists are implying? All your worries are down to this superstitious belief in a God that probably does not exist they say, enjoyment comes in ignoring God. Have you come across masses of people worrying about the existence of God? Are our churches full of people looking for God?

A more sinister aspect of this type of propaganda is that by implication those who believe in and serve this living God are part and parcel of the problem, it is us who are keeping back the full 'freedom' that allows individuals to 'enjoy' life.

But back to my question, what do I think of me being self-sufficient? If I were to ask that question as my 'old man' just living to satisfy my flesh then my answer would be Yes I am self sufficient. But the God shaped vacuum in each of us can only be filled by God. Any time I have looked to achievements or possessions to fulfil me I find the 'buzz' the 'satisfaction' is very short lived.

But my inner being, my soul and my spirit can only be touched by the Lord. My sense of belonging, my reason for existence is found in the Lord and fully realised when I put on the 'new man'.

Lord may I learn to rely on you more and more so that my life can be fully lived based on your sufficiency.

Finally ......... a thought for to-day

To master temptation, let Christ master you.

Part 5 Self - Righteousness

The most difficult part of this 'self' examination is now before me.

The problem with being self-righteous is that it is very difficult to see it in yourself, or at least I do. We have a tendency to judge ourselves by the standards of others around us.

Usually we are 'calibrated', to what we believe to be an acceptable moral standard, through our family upbringing. We have the influence of societies standards, usually taught in a school and / or work environment, developed as we interact with others from outside our families.

I have a personal belief, that more and more in what passes for acceptable moral standards, comes from the 'eye' that sits in the corner of most living rooms. Yes! the television that beams the daily 'soaps', the daily doses of so called reality television , all pumping out 'dross' that is called entertainment. The subtle message is repeated over and over again, always the same, over and over.

"This is the age of enlightenment, everyone has the right to do what they want to do. There is no absolute right or wrong!".

For a Christian (especially in the UK) to say that they believe that many of the topics being promoted in these programmes are a sin in the sight of God, leads to these Christians being labelled as 'Narrow Minded' and 'Bigoted'. There is no room for the concept that God's standards are not the standards of the world.

So what is my difficulty with self-righteousness? It comes down to 'judgement' not in terms of decision making but judgement of myself against others. I find it very easy to judge others, in an interview situation, I have found myself making a judgement on a prospective candidate, just as they entered the room, before they had a chance to speak a word.

But what about some introspection, some detailed self examination? Well! that is a different matter.

As I said in a previous post a few days ago. "I like me". So I do find it difficult to be critical of my actions, and even my motives for taking those actions. Many times I have found myself in the role of a Pharisee saying "I thank you Lord that I am not like those other people". Remember the line from the song "Oh! Lord it's hard to be humble when you are perfect in every way"should be playing in the background when those thoughts come to mind. (However: The next line in the same song I can easily reject as not being attributable to myself).

Ever find it difficult to think of a 'small size','medium size', 'big size' sin to confess to the Lord? We rank everything. It is as if we have an internal scale of justice that we use to measure our actions and other's actions against.

Other people's actions / motives on one side, and our actions / motives on the other side of the scale. My scales are not evenly balanced, I am very lenient when I judge my actions / motives, and I can usually come up with a justification or some mitigating circumstance that attempts to cover my tracks.

But I am reminded that the Eyes of the Lord can see through my deception.

It is only when I judge myself against God's perfect standards that I can see the gap in real performance. When I fall short of his perfect standard, I sin.

Isaiah 64:6 'But we are like an unclean thing, And all our righteousness's are like filthy rags; We all fade as a leaf, And our iniquities, like the wind, Have taken us away'.

God's appearance is so intense that it is like an all consuming fire that burns everything in it's path. No man can see God and live in his fallen state. If we are so impure how can we be saved? Only by God's mercy. He forgives us based upon the work of our Lord and his death upon the cross.

1Peter 2:24 'Who Himself bore our sins in His own body on the tree, that we, having died to sins, might live for righteousness - by whose stripes we are healed'.

Lord help me live not in my own righteousness but remember that it was you who bore my sins and iniquities so that I might live. A sinner saved by grace.

Finally .......... a thought for to-day

Calvary's cross is the ONLY bridge to eternal life

Part 4 Self - Dependency

Lord do I have a tendency to do things alone without your help and guidance? I know the answer before asking the question.

Ever try to witness to someone without asking the Lord for help & guidance? Guilty.

Ever promise the Lord that you will do this and you won't do that and then reverse the order by not doing what you said you would do, and doing the things you said you would not do? Again Guilty.

Do you go ahead and try things that you know in your heart, in your very spirit the Lord is telling you, or has told you, not to do? Once more guilty.

I would love to say these types of self-dependencies have only been one-off occurrences in my life, but sad to say I am a very very slow learner and have repeated this pattern many times.
When I was growing up during my childhood, the biggest fear I had was not meeting what I believed to be my parents expectations. Expectations of academic success, expectations of attaining the same success as my brother, expectations of 'being a somebody'.

Looking back I am now convinced that these expectations were mostly in my own mind, but as a child when you know that you haven't the ability, either academically, or physically to attain certain objectives, and you so want to please your parents or loved ones, then to succeed you have to rely on your wits and become a master of illusion. The picture of a swan calmly moving on the surface of the water, while below the water the feet are frantically paddling away to keep afloat best illustrates the feelings I had at that time.
I became very dependent upon my own ability, I could not admit I needed help. I had to become self-dependent.

When the Lord saved me I knew that he wanted all of me. He wanted me to depend upon him for my life, for my future, for my very existence. I am still in this moulding process. I still have a tendency to hold onto the 'old man' and I still have a tendency to do things in my own strength but I am never failed by the Lord's love and forgiveness.
So it comes down to dying to self. (Everyday)

"Come unto me all you who are labour and are heavy laden and I will give you rest". Matthew 11:28

Finally........... a thought for to-day

God gives strength in proportion to the strain

Part 3 Self-Centredness

I love me! - who do you love? If our body (flesh) could speak I am sure it would say exactly that. We use the word centre to ‘position’ things in the English language. We hear things like ‘Centre of the universe’, central government, central command etc. Young and not so young people ‘in love’ will often be heard to say to their loved ones, “you are the centre of my world”.

A bit of trivia I learned recently is that the town in which I was born, Banbridge in Northern Ireland is ‘the most central position’ on earth that is the furthest distance from known earthquake fault lines. So if you hate earthquakes it is a wonderful place to live.

So being self-centred puts me at the epicentre of my existence. The goal is to please number one. ME.

I find it interesting to reflect on these different aspects of self. They have tendency to merge into one another. But I am finding that there are subtle differences that can be discovered.

I view self-centredness as a character trait that does just what it says it will do. The self-centred objective will be to get what you want no matter the possible detrimental effects to others. I would go as far as to say that true self-centredness means that you will do anything to get your 'own' way.

So am I the centre of my world, or is Jesus the centre of my world? Oh! how I would love to be able to say to is the Lord Jesus that is my focus, my centre, but I know that I would be lying if I said that. I still do many things to please me. Knowing that I could be using my time to things that I know would please the Lord, still does not necessarily mean that I will put the Lord first. Often these can and do take second place in my life.

I have to make a conscious choice each day to put off the old man. I have to make a choice to die to self.

Finally .......... a thought for to-day

The world crowns success; God crowns faithfulness.

A Blessed Night Out

I was in Scotland this week on business. During that time I took the opportunity to visit one of my daughters' who is studying Politics and Religious studies at Stirling University (who said religion and politics cannot mix)? She attends a Pentecostal church at a small town called Larbert when she is not back home in Ireland. It just happened that this church along with a ministry in Northern Ireland called 'Drop Inn Ministries' http://www.dropinn.net/ had arranged for a gospel group called 'The Isaacs' from the USA to perform at some concerts in Northern Ireland and in Scotland to support the Drop Inn Ministries work. Wow, what a wonderful and blessed night that was. I was blown away with the Isaacs musical ability and am now a bluegrass fan. Gospel style.

Finally ....... a thought for to-day

You can gain knowledge on your own, but wisdom comes from God.

Part 2 Self - Advancement

Following on from Yesterday's post, I am not sure that I am going to like this weeks review on SELF. I know what I said about myself 8 years ago and a cursory glance at what I wrote back then tells me that I have not moved on in many of the areas of my life.

Before I start, I have to say that I like me. I am very content with who I am, and I have no wish to model myself on anyone else apart from the Lord.

Therein lies the first problem. I like this me. I like to please and pamper this body of mine, I like to exercise my mind with things that interest me. As for my soul & spirit, well in thoseaspects of my life I let the Lord take care of that. But I am very aware that if I have not handed over my complete 'being' to the Lord, then an inner conflict can and does take place.

So how does this affect self-advancement in my life? The first sin committed by Adam was a case of self-advancement. Believing that he would become like God Adam ate the fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil. The consequence for this sin required our Lord to redeem us back to God and the world and mankind has suffered ever since that day.

I believe that the desire for individuals to promote self, to be the head and not the tail. To lead and not to follow is in our fallen DNA.

As I approach retirement in a few years time I regret wasting so much energy on my quest for self advancement. The maneuvering, the worry, the fretting, is all vanity. Solomon is right life lived with that mindset is all vanity.

I wish that I had realised what I am about to say many years ago! An advantage to getting older is that you have a longer time to look back over, and in looking back, I can see that God has watched over me all my life, even before I became a Christian.

Through his grace I have prospered in all the jobs I have taken, and have been blessed in my marriage and in my family.

There is a saying that I use when talking about about experience which goes: 'Experience is something that tells you when you make the same mistake twice'.
But the truth about experience with the Lord is that learn that he can be relied upon to be with you, to guide you, to mature you in the things of God.

Humility, meekness and a servants heart, are not natural in the world. Most people would see those attributes as a weakness, I have never seen any business leader with those attributes, just the opposite.

Putting others first, walking that extra mile with those in need might be easy to do once in a while, but to do it continually in a life long service can only be realised through God's intervention in our lives.

Being God centred, moulded with God's DNA gives us his power that allows us to be humble, meek, and have a servants heart. In that condition we find true life.

Lord promote the advancement of your kingdom in my life and not my self-advancement.

Finally ........... a thought for to-day

To live for Christ, we must die to self.

Part 1 Self

I have grown accustomed to finding out that what the world values, what the world respects, what the world hold up as exemplar is 180 degrees opposite from what God values, respects and would most likely say is an exemplar standard of life.

As I have gotten older I have gone through some decades when the world changed it's focus and direction.

In the 60's the goal was for individuals to 'Find themselves'. The world was taken over with 'free love'. In the 70's the goal was to 'Improve yourself' pamper your inner being, in the 80's the goal was 'Please yourself' get more things like bigger cars, bigger houses, the 90's up to the present day is all about 'Expressing ourselves' it is all about me.

Notice the common thread? Self. The Lord told us to die to self to find true life. The world says live for self, please self, magnify self. I am always struck when watching shows like 'American Idol' or the UK version of the same programme called 'Pop Idol' (Please Note: I do not have ownership of the TV remote control) how the young hopefuls and the not so young hopefuls crave 'fame and fortune' how their 'lives will be over of they do not succeed to become the next Pop Idol'. Nothing wrong in getting on in this world but if your motivation is just to please self, then it will cause problems in any relationship with God.

There is a God shaped vacuum in every individual that cannot be filled with material things, or wild living, it can only be filled with God.

About 8 years ago I was on business in Montreal in Canada and I heard Dr Charles Stanley give a sermon on the topic of SELF LIFE. He asked listeners to examine themselves against the certain criteria. I did this 'self' examination of myself back then, and over the next week or so I intend to do it again. Maybe it is something that we should all do for ourselves on a regular basis.

Here are the criteria:

Self-Advancement – am I always trying to get ahead and think only of what people think of my status and of me.

Self-centredness – am I the centre of my world or is Jesus the centre of my world.

Self-dependency – do I have a way of doing it alone with God’s help and guidance.

Self-righteousness – do I feel that I do not need God’s forgiveness.

Self-sufficiency – do I feel that I don’t need God and his love and guidance?

Self-will – Do I insist on doing it my way.

Just as a contrast in Galatians 5 verse 22 & 23 it says:
‘But the fruit of the spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.

Finally .......... A though for today

The Bible is a mirror that lets us see ourselves as God sees us

The Speed of Love

To-day the Lord blessed me with joy. He really lifted me out of the valley, and despite people in work trying to ruin this joy filled day I managed to finish work still joyful.

My life, in and around work is currently operating at 150 MPH. No time to think, no time to reflect, only WORK. The mantra seems to be 'pace pace pace'. Sometime it changes to 'speed speed speed'. Apparently there are sections in Montana in the USA that defines the speed limit on the roads by words not numbers. Drivers are asked to drive at a speed that is 'reasonable and prudent'. One motorist was clocked doing 150MPH. The same speed as my work life.

Now those that really know me, know that I like to think about things. I like to ruminate, to chew the cud, to take my time, before leaping into action. Well! not really leaping more lurching into action.

Now! I am not so laid back that I am horizontal, but as I said I am working at the fastest pace I have every done in my 43 years of work experience. At lunch time to-day I had to 'dash out' from a 'webex' meeting (internet based conference call) with my boss who was in Indianapolis in the US to do a second talk following on from last weeks talk (12th March) to a small Christian fellowship group in work. As I was going up the stairs I said a quick prayer to the Lord that he would quieten my mind and my heart, slow me down was the real plea. I was still operating at speed, my mind not focused on the talk, it would be considered neither 'reasonable and prudent' that I gave this talk in that frame of mind. But the Lord did quieten my mind and the talk went ahead.

The talk was the second part of a review I was doing on a book entitled "I became a Christian and all I got was this lousy t-shirt", by Vince Antonucci. As I was going through my the review I was struck, or should I correctly say the Lord 'focused' my mind upon a small portion of this book. It was all about 'SPEED' to be precise 'GOD's SPEED'.

I can 'influence' the speed of my work life, but I realised that I can control the speed of my life outside work. No one else sets my speed limit outside work. The Lord asks us to go to a quite place, a meeting place were we can abide with him. You cannot abide at a fast pace, it is too frenetic.

Even though the Lord was extremely busy, the bible tells us that he made time to pray to his father, made time to stop and heal people, made time to produce an environments where people loved to be in his presence such as the time where Mary could sit at his feet, while Martha was 'busy' preparing food. We know who the Lord commended, for their actions and it wasn't the one being busy (can you imagine Martha cooking for a house full of people with no help, 'speed speed speed, pace pace pace' must have been one of her concerns hence her 'request' for help).

So what is God's speed? A Japanese theologian called Kosuke Koyama wrote:

God walks "slowly" because he is love. If he is not love he would have gone much faster. Love has its speed. It is an inner speed. it is a spiritual speed. It is a different kind of speed from the technological speed to which we are accustomed..... It goes on in the depth of our life whether we notice or not, whether we are currently hit by storm or not at three miles an hour. It is the speed we walk and therefore it is the speed the love of God walks.

Jesus said "Follow me". I am doing 150MPH in one direction and the Lord is saying follow in my footsteps, abide with me. I need to slow down and walk at the Lord's speed. I need to stroll at 3 MPH the speed of love, the speed of calm reflection, in the footsteps and by default in the direction the Lord is leading at a speed set by God to true LIFE.


Finally ........... a thought for to-day

A cubicle in work can seem like a padded cell without a door. (Prayer and mediation on the Lord frees us from bondage and captivity)

The Perfect 'Earthly' Relationship

The bible tells us that we are created in God's image. The bible also tells us that God is love. So I can only conclude that we are designed by God to love and be loved. When God made Adam he determined that it was not good that he should be alone, so God made a companion for Adam a woman called Eve. The first God ordained marriage between a man and a woman was the result.

It is very clear in the warnings given throughout the Bible, against sins such as adultery ,that marriage and the sacredness of marriage is very, very important in God's eyes. There is a linking of souls when a man and a woman come together as man a wife. God calls it 'one flesh'.

I am blessed by have a loving wife, who is my love, and my 'soul mate'. When I think about the degree of love that we have for each other, we are so in tune with each other that we have become 'one flesh'. The trust, love and selflessness of her love to me and our 'girls' is a priceless gift.

We choose to love someone, it is a choice. Many people find that after the first few years of married life that the original attractiveness of their partner has faded, and a relationship based upon appearance will fail over time. No amount of 'youth' creams and 'anti-aging' products can hold back the effects of time on our faces and bodies.

It is interesting that the world looks on the outward appearance of a person and judges them by how they look and what they possess. You do not see 'ordinary' people on the front of some of these expensive magazines, no, in the main you see lovers of publicity, lovers of fame, lovers of self.

God on the other hand looks at our hearts. He is interested in how we appear to him as our true selves. He looks at our heart for our 'beauty'.

May I remember to thank the Lord on a regular basis for the love between Hazel my wife and myself. May I also remember that without your help any inner beauty in my heart will wither and die. Lord I thank you for this perfect relationship that I have with my Hazel. She was, is and will always be one of your greatest gifts to me. Thank you my Lord.


Finally ............A thought for to-day:

Oh! to live your life in such a way that when your feet hit the floor in the morning, Satan shudders & says, "Oh no....she's/he's awake!!"

The Perfect Relationship

Lord in these days when I am so busy it seems that my life revolves around work and not around you. The net effect of that is that I become less sensitive to hearing your voice, heeding your guidance. My heart seems to get harder and less caring, I become 'me' centric and others are of less importance. It's as if the more I drift from God's love and influence in my life, I turn into myself, to my strength to fill the void.

The answer? I know the answer. Taking time out of the day for quiet communion with the Lord. Giving him the opportunity to minister to my soul. So easy to say, so difficult to achieve on a consistent basis.

I know from past experience that my strength is not sufficient to live a full satisfying life. Lord remind me that the Christian life needs you at the core, you as the focus, you as the power.

It's all about you and for you, but the wonderful thing about it is, that with the right focus, I am blessed, I am built up, I am enriched. You Lord do not need my company to be fulfilled but I on the other hand need you in my life for completeness as a human being, living as you designed me to live.


Finally ........................A thought for to-day

I'm really easy to get along with - once you people learn to see it MY way. (how often do we live with that frame of mind)?

23rd Psalm for the Workplace

I came across this version of the 23rd Psalm with a modern viewpoint connected to work. I do not know the author's name, but I think that is very apt for this economic climate we face, and the uncertainities of job stability.

23rd Psalm for the Workplace

The Lord is my real boss and I shall not want,
He gives me peace when chaos is all around me.
He gently reminds me to pray before I speak and to do all things
without murmuring and complaining.
He reminds me that he is my source and not my job,
He restores my sanity every day and guides my decisions that I might honour him in everything I do.

Even though I face absurd amounts of Emails, system crashes, unrealistic deadlines, budget cutbacks, gossiping co-workers, discriminating managers, and an aging body that doesn't cooperate every morning, I will not stop - - for he is with me!

His presence, His peace, and power will see me through.
He raises me up, even when they fail to promote me.
He claims me as His own, even when the company threatens to let me go.

His faithfulness and love are better than any bonus payment,
His retirement plan beats every pension plan there is.
When it's all said and done, I'll be working for him a whole lot longer and for that, I bless his Name.


Finally..... a thought for to-day:

Your mouth is the microphone of your heart.

Exceedingly Great Joy

In Matthew 2:10, it tells is about the reaction of the three wise men when they saw the star, that was pointing them to where Jesus was on the earth. But this same chapter tells us about other reactions much different than those of the wise men. King Herod wanted to know where Jesus the Messiah was so the he could eliminate him. The reaction of the scribes and the religious leaders seemed to be one of indifference and the city dwellers in Jerusalem were troubled. These same reactions are around today. The 'free thinkers', 'humanists,''atheists' et al, have the common view of killing off Jesus from our society. Many of the religious leaders are indifferent to his teachings and select passages of scripture that suit their particular viewpoint or lifestyle. Finally the people are troubled if they hear about Jesus preached to them and their need to repent from their sins.

But it is the phase "with exceedingly great joy" that jumps off the page at me. Enjoying God, talking about God, reflecting on God's goodness leads to joy. The joy of the Lord. The only time I am truly passionate in my speech is when I talk about the Lord or his works in my life. Then I like the wise men 'experience exceeding great joy.' Lord give me your joy in my life more often.